Complaining about Female Problems !!!

Complaining about Female Problems !!!

It is very interesting that a few days ago I was talking with a friend of mine who has been around for about 4 years of my life, and one of the reasons we became friends because his former mentor transitioned from male to female too. The topic was not what I originally expected from them and gave me some insight into some facts that were quite unique. We began talking about what exactly I complain about, things that were in fact things any women complain about and not what the vast majority of transwomen complain about.

Now this comes from someone who has listened to me ramble on and talk constantly for the last 4 years, but only ever experienced me as a transgender woman, but knew me before breast augmentation and vaginoplasty surgeries and after.

I personally never even noticed, and it took someone from the outside to point it out, and I was entirely shocked, but also amazed at how this was in fact another confirmation of being a woman. The fact that I was complaining about female problems and not transgender problems was truly inspiring and gave me a feeling of being more complete, even though I already felt that. Sometimes hearing things that reinforced that helps drastically in knowing that some things were worth it in the end.

I want to make note that I never complain about being a woman, but in fact complain about experiences and situations that women experience.

So like exactly what do I mean by complaining about women's things? I will do the best I can to explain without sounding offensive because not all women act the same way, but there is an underlying general thing that a lot of women share. Not everything is exactly complaining more or less topics I seem to bring up about particular situations.

My Body

I have noticed that like any other woman, we all have this ideal image inside our minds of what we want to look like. I mean exactly that, what we want to look like, not the image provided to us by the media and traditional models. We each have issues with our body, some are able to accept them and others want to change them. While this doesn’t always pertain to women, men have these same issues. However, the things that I find myself complaining about are things about my boob size, my skincare, and keeping it clean and clear to look pretty. I also complain about my belly and that I want it to look smaller and more sexy in appearance, basically overall wanting to be skinny. I should note I am 150 pounds so I really should not complain.

I have this ideal model image in my mind as a personal opinion of what I would love to look like, a gorgeous woman who is capable of being a model, but as I am 55 years old, that is becoming harder and harder with each day. However, I still try to achieve a beautiful body, a sexy female form from head to toe and often criticize every little feature that doesn’t fit right. It is not uncommon for some men to do this, but I can almost say that a certain majority of women like myself complain about their bodies in some way. Some take action to fix it and some don’t take any action to change this. This is just common for women to want to look appealing to other males, females, or others in general.

Other Women

Why exactly would I complain about other women, well it is not so much about complaining about other women but that other women will sometime see me as a threat around other men. I have noticed that I am talking a lot about other women looking at me with clothing that expresses my style in a way to appear attractive, or attention seeking, which seems to get scolding looks from other women who feel I may be threatening. When I say threatening I am referring to the fear that I am drawing their man's attention, which I have done non-intentionally many times. Now, I don’t look like a supermodel but I do attempt to look as attractive as possible.

I don’t mind talking to other women and when given the chance we normally can talk about anything, but this is normally easier with women who don’t have a partner. It seems the other women think I might try to take their man, which is interesting when I don’t have any interest in men. So I find myself always feeling like I am in competition with other women until I realize I am no threat, which if I am correct is something other women experience constantly any time we believe there is another woman who might appear prettier than ourselves.

My Makeup

Heading out of the house, taking pictures, getting on camera or anything at all, constantly putting on makeup, or at the very least preparing to look presentable. Makeup seems to be a common thing that women talk about and almost never speak about with straight men. While there are women who don’t wear makeup and some who don’t care about it, makeup is a very feminine product. I believe it is safe to say that the majority of women think about makeup.

How does that fall into a category with me constantly talking about it? Well, complain about things like whether the makeup looks good, what products to buy, and what colors and patterns should I use for my face. Will they match my outfit and so forth? The constant discussion of makeup is such a massive subject. I find myself always talking about it and if it looks good, and trying new things and color palettes.

My Fashion

I am often trying to figure out what to wear, what looks good, and if I can pull it off. The idea that it looks good or not is something that I constantly struggle with. Things that might look good don’t often go together after putting it on. So I find myself matching my makeup to my outfit, but often having to go through many outfits in my closet each time I try to find something to put on. Even took an outfit that I thought would be sexy or pretty and changed my mind to switch outfits after nearly getting completely ready. Trying to look good and feel pretty, keeping up with the common fashion, or at least attempting to.

Yes I know, not all women care about this sort of thing, but unlike many men, who will almost throw on anything before walking out the door without a care in the world, a woman will most likely look through and still attempt to find clothing that matches and have a fashionable style. So finding the right outfit and appearing fashionable is often a feminine trait.

MEN!!!

This one is something I probably complain about the most. There is just something about men that brings me so many questions and concerns, and likely ask myself so many times why they do certain things. Of course, you could say I was once a man according to the history of being an intersex transgender woman, however, even then I still did not understand it.

So this topic could be fairly large, but I don’t want to overextend myself on this, but touch base on a few things. Questioning why men will often find ways to just make you feel uncomfortable as a woman, or just do things that may seem normal to a man but seem offensive to a woman. One thing I have come to learn is the woman side of things when it comes to being around men.

They need to stare at my chest in nearly any conversation as if they can’t look me in the eyes. The need to get your attention to show you something if it is just to have a chance to talk to you. The strange way men look at you when you are talking. The feeling that no matter what you say, they have to confirm it, or verify that you are wrong even if you are right. The way that when you speak, most guys don’t hear you, or could be blatantly ignoring you when they talk over you about their topic. Or if they are grouped up, with you the only girl around, they try to show off like in a way to do stupid stuff. Sometimes you can even tell in a group of guys, they are talking about you, and their actions clearly tell you it's sexual.

On the other hand, there is also the catering to the woman, do you need this, would you like this, can I get you something? Hold the door open sometimes, and lift heavy objects for you even if you are capable. Sometimes these things are nice, but I don’t understand why there is a big difference between this and how they act as superior to women.

But privately, talking to men online, or talking to them one on one, the subject always and I mean always turns dirty fast. Online, you get creeps who send dick photos in their opening conversation, to the guys who talk to you long enough to get to know you and then quickly move into the sexual talk even if you avoid it. It is like something hardwired in men that just doesn’t change. I wish there was a better understanding of men.

Conclusion

Anyways, there are so many things I don’t understand. I wish I could explain more to the understanding of men and if anyone has insight into this please let me know. But overall, I find myself on topics that are not always complaining but just have little to no reference to being transgender at all but common problems that other women have. So, all in all, it's interesting that transgender is not really been a topic I talk about anymore, except for here.

After all that has transpired in my entire life, being a transgender intersex woman, it really isn’t a topic that I talk about with anyone anymore. It is not that I am trying to hide it, but more that I don’t see myself as anything less than a woman and that I just live my life as a female day in and day out and have little thought about being or ever was trans.